Friday 28 May 2010

Marks & Spencers decide misogyny is the best way to sell bras


M&S just can't seem to get it right. Since 1884 until about a decade ago they were adored for their simple, well priced clothing. But then they tried to do that terrible thing that befalls many a retailer.

They tried to be cool.

In today's Metro is the most tragic and appallingly offensive decision in their history. Presumably a decision made by the new Chief Executive Marc Bolland (formerly of Morrisons), there is a full page ad featuring a pair of breasts with a large font stating: "Perfect fits".

See what they've done there?

How hilarious... How witty...

No, how Razzle of them.

Bolland is the man who thought Nick Hancock would be a good ambassador for his previous brand. Put that decision in Room 101.

I would argue that this advert is a betrayal of every woman who has ever shopped at M&S. To reduce their branding to an advert that looks more like a spread in Zoo or Nuts magazine than an advert for a high street retailer

And what exactly are M&S trying to achieve? The only possible repercussion of this is that they might sell a few more over-sized lacy bras to perverts for them to masturbate into.

Was that the intention M&S? If it is, then I would ask that Bolland be the one charged with mopping up the changing rooms at closing time.

Please withdraw these ads as soon as possible, M&S. I know there's a recession but resorting to the objectification of women and pathetic porn-y stunts is beyond desperate. I for one will not be purchasing any more of their lunchtime snacks until these appalling ads are a distant memory.

But let's be honest about M&S' real problems. If their fashion designs were half as tasty as their ready meals, they'd be on the cover of U.S. Vogue every month.

Monday 10 May 2010

Danny Dyer


There won't be many of you that haven't already heard about the uproar over Danny Dyer's column in Zoo magazine last week but for the sake of posterity, here is what happened. Dyer writes an advice column for the magazine, in which men write to him with their woes. In last week's edition, 23-year old Alex from Manchester wrote in to ask how he should get over his girlfriend. Dyer's thoughtful advice was as follows:

"You've got nothing to worry about, son. I'd suggest going out on a rampage with the boys, getting on the booze and smashing anything that moves. Then, when some bird falls for you, you can turn the tables and break her heart. Of course, the other option is to cut your ex's face, and then no one will want her."

Seriously, what the fuck?

In some ways I am glad this has happened because it has brought into the public forum, what many of us have known for years. That these magazines are designed solely to promote hatred of women.

Just to be clear, this is not 'lad culture' or 'Loaded culture'. That was about drinking and football and the worship of women. I was a Loaded reader in the 90s and it was a truly great magazine. It was the reason I wanted to get into magazines. And if you think the original Loaded was anything like the current filthy rag of the same name, think again.

90s lad culture was not necessarily always a positive thing but neither was it dangerous. Nuts and Zoo are not capturing the zeitgeist unless you count the fact that rapes and domestic violence are on the up and here are two magazines devoted to ensuring they continue to rise. Porn is bad but porn is on the top shelf. Zoo and Nuts are next to Country Life and Heat. Now I know the latter is most likely read by misogynists and the former is determined to make every woman feel like shit about her body but they are not the same as the two manuals for trainee rapists. Porn objectifies women. Zoo and Nuts promote the hatred of women and the belief that they are second class citizens.

All three major political parties failed to put women's issues at the forefront of their campaigns. Whoever decides to do so in time for the inevitable reelection in six months, will get my vote. Well, provided they agree to curb the excesses of these rotten rags under the incitement to violence act that is.